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| The birth and development of "Euro-English" |
| Ann C. Lippincott,
Ph.D. Teacher Education Program - Gevirtz Graduate School
of Education
University of California Santa Barbara, CA. 93106-9490 /
805-893-3711 |
The European Commission
has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the
official language of the European nation rather than German
which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded
that English spelling had some room for improvement and has
accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as
"Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".
Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.
The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k".
This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one
less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year
when the troublesome "ph" will be replased with
the "f". This will make words like fotograf 20%
shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan
be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes
are possible. Governments will enkourage the removalof double
letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e"
in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing
"th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd
from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer,
ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find
it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil
finali kum tru. If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas it on to oza
pepl.
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